porridgereport.com

Moms are on facebook.¬† While this may not be an issue for kids as young as mine – who are not yet old enough to post their latest thrills and woes to the online community – it’s an increasing concern among the college set.¬† Would I have ever wanted my parents to catch a glimpse of my exploits at university?¬† Not a chance… but then again, how could they have?¬† The only proof of my shenanigans would have been through the testimony of other drunk twenty-somethings whose memory would have been too impaired to recall with any accuracy anyways.¬† By the time my kids are that age, their generation will undoubtedly have wisened to the folly of proclaiming every action (mundane or explicit) on the internet. Today’s teens, however, are still on the learning curve.

This viral video is a hilarious (although quite crude) presentation of the perils that young adults face as their witless ways, posted on facebook, are evermore exposed to the entire world (uh, Moms and Dads included.) Teenagers, egocentric as they are, have been ignorant to the realities of posting inappropriate images and proclamations on the internet.  It looks like the gig is up and many are realizing that the internet really does include EVERYONE in the world.  Time to start deleting.  Unfortunately, they say once something goes online, it never goes away.

It’s report card time again.¬† Unfortunately, I’ve come to dread reading my boys’ reports as much¬†as the mutual fund statements¬†I get from the bank.¬† It’s not the marks that are the problem.¬† It’s the commentary.¬† I could spend thirty minutes¬†reading every sentence provided by the teacher along the right column of the page, but I’d be no further ahead in understanding what exactly my son needs to do to earn a higher mark.¬†

That’s why I keep it simple.¬† In five minutes I can review his marks and determine if he deserves accolades or a lecture.¬† Did he get A’s or B’s (and better not be C’s.)¬† Did his marks go up or down?¬† I can easily determine how well he has behaved in class by reviewing the bottom one-quarter of the report that lists his progress in Learning Skills (Excellent, Good, Satisfactory, or Needs Improvement.)¬†

No comments are necessary.¬† That’s not to say I wouldn’t appreciate knowing more specifics about why¬†one son¬†went down in Social Studies¬†and another went down in Science and Technology, but the comments listed provide no such indication.¬†

Here are examples of what was provided on my kids’ report cards:

“He investigates mechanisms that include simple machines and enable movement with considerable accuracy.¬† He should continue to assess the impact of simple machines and mechanisms, on people and the world around them.”¬† — Okay.¬† I’ll get right on that!

Other comments border on comical, such as this one on Physical Education:

“He is encouraged to practise jumping and landing safely, using takeoff combinations of one or two feet.”¬† — Perhaps I should have him jump off his bed more often?

That report card listed 51 lines of similar comments.  Besides the fact that they about are as reader-friendly as a manual on how to assemble a cell phone with one hand, they are typed in a miniscule font size.  It makes one wonder whether the school boards even believe we bother to read them. 

I realize teachers spend copious hours doing¬†students’ report cards and are, themselves, shackled by the Ontario boards’ guidelines.¬† They have little flexibility and, I believe, are truly doing their best.¬† Lamented one teacher recently on¬†the Tyndale Library¬†blog’s comments:

We MUST print them this way in our board. They will never get signed by the principal if they are done without the ministry expectations. We are told year after year. DON’T MAKE THEM PERSONAL. USE THE MINISTRY EXPECTATIONS. We slave over those comments, which I agree, make absolutely no sense to someone who isn’t familiar with outcomes. All teachers know that parents look at 2 things on reports which are, the actual grades and the learning skills comments at the bottom. That’s the way reports should be. Grades and then a small blurb about how they are doing. There is a high rate of teacher absences surrounding every reporting period. Why? Teachers get really stressed about these reports, get sick and end up off work. Make them manageable and you’ll see teachers at school during reporting periods. Come on ministry.

There is hope in sight for baffled parents.¬† Globe and Mail reported recently that the Ontario Ministry of Education plans to allow teachers the option of writing their own comments¬†or continuing to use the prefabricated ones provided.¬† The question remains, however, as to how much liberty teachers will¬†be given¬†in their wording selection?¬† If they will continue to be forced to write specific examples of academic achievement, such as how high one needs to jump in phys.ed., it seems quite plausible that teachers will likely continue to do what’s easier – slot in a ready-made comment.

But if teachers are given a fair amount of autonomy, then parents may find reading report cards a lot more enjoyable and informative.¬† Somehow, I don’t see that happening anytime soon.

Parents are often shocked when they learn that I read aloud to my boys.  The thought conjures up images of cuddling into bed with a toddler to read a picture book with talking animals.  My boys, however, are six, eight, and ten years old.  The older two are accomplished readers already and are more than capable of reading on their own (which they do voraciously Рof comics and graphica!)  My youngest child, Cal, still struggling to make sense of that mix of letters that form words, is the only one who really fits the profile of the bedtime story child.

In our household these days, Cal is hardpressed to get a peek at brightly illustrated pages because he’s sitting among his big brothers as I read, uh,¬†novels – one chapter at a time every night.¬† I’ve tried and tried and tried to encourage my older boys to pick up a classic to read on their own.¬† They just don’t have the will or ambition to read a full length novel.¬† They are far more comfortable perusing the same Captain Underpants or Diary of a Wimpy Kid than a novel of my choice.¬† Unless I read aloud to them.

In an earlier post I wrote about my experience reading Pinocchio to them, as well as the first Harry Potter installment.¬† All three boys sat quietly through every chapter.¬† I’d periodically look up from the page to quiz them on the latest action in the book when¬†their flaccid faces caused me to suspect they weren’t listening.¬† But not so.¬† They always had a quick and ready answer, then would encourage me to carry on with the story.

While there is as much push as ever to get our young kids to learn to read as early as possible, parents may want to consider exactly what that means to a child’s reading autonomy.¬† It should not, in fact, be an automatic precursor to silent, individual reading.¬† When an adult shares a longer, albeit more complicated, story with early readers, it affords the opportunity for children to talk aloud about the action of the story.¬† Aside from the obvious bonding¬†benefits (which is ever-fleeting as the kids grow up), it helps develop that more elusive aspect to reading – comprehension of the story.

When Pinocchio kills the friendly cricket (no – we did not read¬†the Disney version), we discussed it and all agreed that was not a nice thing to do!¬† While reading The Indian in the Cupboard (a surprisingly fantastic book), I enjoyed watching my¬†eight-year old smile appreciatively when the story described the crybaby cowboy character.¬† I could see he was relating to “Boohoo Boone’s” propensity to get emotional when life gets a little tough (he’s our sensitive boy who is not immune to being called a crybaby himself by his less charitable brothers.)¬†

When my oldest son, John, brought home The Indian in the Cupboard a couple months ago from the school library, I was thrilled and strongly encouraged him to read it.  He did, until he lost interest in it in two days later.  Then the boys asked me start reading it at bedtime. 

“I thought you didn’t want to read it?” I asked John.

He shrugged and cocked his head to the side.¬† “Well, that’s different.¬† I’ll like it if you read it to us.”

So I did.  And, we loved it.

With Mother’s Day only a couple months away, this commercial offers a funny reminder to women of the hit and misses that we suffer from our husbands’ gift selections.¬† I’m lucky.¬† My husband has a real knack for picking out gifts.¬† I’ve received beautiful jewellery, gorgeous purses, and stylish clothes.¬† Although the commercial is, essentially, an ad for JC Penney, it’s¬†a funny, satirical¬†commentary on the¬†opposing perspectives of men and women.¬† The biggest question I have is… even if we all had a man-sized doghouse in our backyard, would any husband really be willing to enter it on our command?¬† Don’t think so.

I don’t often have wonderful things to say about television’s impact on kids, however the Olympic Games are a clear exception to my usual rant against the boob tube.¬† Canada’s spirited display of a country bursting with pride at not only their stellar athletes, but the nation itself has been an inspiring experience for all of us who have been watching.¬† The television has managed to spread that indefatigable thrill of seeing fellow Canadians push their physical and mental strengths to the limits.¬† And succeed.

My kids now have a new aspiration to add to their list of things they want to be when they grow up.¬† In fact, my 7-year old son came home today with a fill-in-the-blanks activity that he’d completed at school.¬† He was asked to describe himself as a person in a community.¬† Here’s what he wrote:

I am a… Olympic skier.

Here are three things I do in my work.

1. I ski
2. I use poles
3. I start at a mini hut

Something hard about my work is…¬† trying not to crash into trees

Something satisfying about my work is… people watching me on tv.

My work helps make God’s world a good home by… letting people watch their own country skier ski.

Look out firefighters – there’s a new career in town.¬†